Loss

It's been a sad few weeks. Our sweet Josie had a sudden onset of seizures without warning and within two days had to be released from her suffering. I am so crushed with this loss. For non-dog lovers I know it's hard to understand, and even for dog lovers my reaction might seem to be excessive but unless you received the kind of unconditional love and joy that she brought to my life, I don't blame you for not understanding. When the kids all moved out, when Jeff was hospitalized in 2012, when Jeff had open heart surgery and spent a summer recuperating in 2013, when I had some very sad, dark days she was my company and my comfort. I am trying very hard not to be the holiday downer, and having the time with my kids and family for those few days last week helped but I am back to my new normal life and feeling the crushing pain of her absence. I hate hearing that I should get a new dog  because it makes me feel like she is replaceable and that is not the case.  I am not saying I will never have another dog, but right now I can't even imagine it.